


It's Okay to Sink

by nightskystar



Category: Natsume Yuujinchou | Natsume's Book of Friends
Genre: Angst, Post-Canon, Still be safe, Suicidal Thoughts, but not really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-07
Updated: 2020-12-07
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:08:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 635
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27936897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nightskystar/pseuds/nightskystar
Summary: Oneshot. Now an independent adult, Takashi starts to have doubts about his life decisions. With a youkai on the prowl, that can spell danger.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 14





	It's Okay to Sink

Takashi descended back first into the water. He uselessly reached a hand up towards the moonlight shining down from the other side of the watery trap. It felt comforting. A light in the dark. The water was cold, he knew, but he felt nothing at all. Like that, he closed his eyes, picturing a warm summer day. 

Soon he was ripped from both his inner peace and the water that had embraced him. 

He landed with a thump and felt the soft dirt of the bank cushioning him. He grasped at nothing at first, and then after turning began coughing up water in ugly gasps. 

"Natsume." A deep voice called.

He coughed a few more times before carefully moving into a sitting position. His limbs felt like they weighed tons. Blearily Takashi looked up at the creature gazing at him from above. Golden eyes stared at him intently. 

The white beast stood gracefully bathed in the night's light. 

"Natsume why did you not fight back?"

Why didn't he fight back? Flashes of memories passed through his head. They had been searching for a youkai that had been influencing the minds of the town locals. Right. What had he been doing leading up to this? How had he ended up in the water? Why did it feel so right to stay there...?

"I- ," he began but he really had no explanation.

"We've been in this town for five days now. You wandered off and I find you taking a dip in a lake... You shouldn't have been affected this much by the power of that weakling."

Takashi shivered as he listened to Nyanko-sensei. He was right. He had been able to ward off the powers of the shadowy yokai so far, but in a moment of weakness he had lost to it.

Takashi was 20 years old now. He had been traveling around the country visiting shrines and forests where youkai resided in. His path wasn't set in stone. Returning names had always been his goal. He tried to stay close when he could, but sometimes he had a reason to go where he thought he could be of help. Money was hard to come by of course, but his forest friends could always be counted on for good food (and drinks). Not that he indulged in that. Too many years of rejecting a cup had made it a habit.

Sometimes he wondered if this was the right thing to be doing. His friends had gone to college and were living their lives. He felt like that was an impossibility for him. He had been gifted with sight of another world. He felt a duty to finish returning names and to continue being involved in the world that he couldn't help but see. 

Sitting there soaked after nearly drowning, Takashi felt those doubts resurface. Those same doubts had gotten him in this mess though. He had been having a nightmare of one day being unable to be a part of either world. Of losing everything. It was just enough for the youkai to get past his defenses. Afterall, they did prey on emotionally compromised humans. 

Now he just felt especially tired. He lay down on his back and stared at the moon. It was full and bright. It had been days of searching with no luck. His eyelids drooped.

"Don't sleep."

"Sensei, let's go back to the inn now." Takashi murmured from his place on the bank. 

"Hold on." The youkai leaned in close to the young man so that he could grab and pull himself up. 

Takashi struggled to muster up strength to fully get on his sensei's back, but Nyanko-sensei pushed him the last bit and they made off.

It was warm. That was the last thing Takashi sensed before letting the exhaustion win.


End file.
